Friday, July 20, 2012

Clomid is an evil, evil wench

I'm not "officially" out yet, but my temperature dropped this morning over 0.6 degrees to my coverline.  That was probably only meaningful to like two people reading this.  Translation:  period is coming and coming fast.

I was noting to T all through this last week that it wasn't successful as I was having no symptoms at all.  He would be quick to remind me that early pregnancy symptoms (i.e. before a positive test) could be a bunch of hogwash, which is certainly true.  But I still figure I'd feel something.

Then yesterday, my body went a little crazy.  (This is where we enter the "too much information" section of the blog.  Move along if you don't want to hear about my boobs being on fire.)

I'll step back and note that I really don't get PMS symptoms.  Maybe a little cranky one day, but I'll get some very specific cramping about 12 hours before my period starts.  I'll maybe get some shooting pains in my boobs a day or so before.  Then once it actually starts, I'll have more generalized cramping for about an hour.  Then I'm on my merry way.

So yesterday, day of boobs being on fire, made me start thinking something was HAPPENING.  Hmmm...I is the "different" I was searching for.  I also had crazy itchy nipples, which I NEVER have, along with that generalized cramping I get normally after the period starts.  At this point in our "journey", I have definitely learned to not get ahead of myself, so off to the googles I went.

In all my preparation with Clomid, I read extensively about side effects while you were actually taking it early in the cycle.  I didn't read about (nor knew about) the impacts it can actually have on your PMS.

Boobs on fire?  Quote from random girl on internet:  "I never had sore breasts in PMS.   But with Clomid, I almost wanted them to fall off to just leave me alone."

Itchy nipples?  Whole post on one of  my websites entitled "Clomid sore and itchy nipples 2ww" with multiple respondents.

Crazy cramps?  Chalk up to Clomid as well.

So my moment of hope only lasted about 10 minutes.  I actually had a visual of the Clomid witch running away cackling while I chased her with a raygun powered by the Google engine.  God bless the interwebs.

The docs do test my ovulation after Clomid by taking a blood sample about seven days after the supposed ovulation.  They want to see the measurement (of progesterone) over 15 which simply means you ovulated.  Mine was 44.  I ovulate like a boss.

We're trying this one more time, but then I'm done with this IUI crap.  It's time to pull out the big guns of IVF again.  We'll probably end up exactly where we are now, but it definitely won't be without a fight.  Plus I've decided I like shots better than Clomid crazy as it sounds. 

Now I'm going to concentrate on the positive side of not being pregnant:  drinking.  We're going to St. Louis this weekend to watch the Cards crush the Cubs with my parents (my husband is a Cubs fan - ha!).  $9 beers for all.  And next weekend we have tickets to a dinner at a new brewery opening in town -- multiple courses paired with local beers.   I'm happy.  I like beer.  Life will be just peachy these next few weeks (and that was not sarcasm).  Have a good weekend yourself!

Monday, July 16, 2012

It's really a miracle anyone gets pregnant

If you have an hour to spare (and it really is worth it), check out this documentary entitled "The Great Sperm Race".  T and I consider ourselves somewhat experts in how reproduction works, and there were still some interesting tidbits here.  It's a very quick hour!

Friday, July 13, 2012

It's my birthday!

Looking forward to fun times with friends and family.  I'll ignore the fact that I'm getting older and my eggs are rotting even more :)

Please keep your fingers crossed for good news for us these next couple weeks!

Saturday, July 7, 2012

It's always something!

I almost had to go to the ER last night.  For anyone who knows me and my husband, that probably elicits more laughter than fear.  Between the two of us, we seriously go to the ER 1 or 2 times a year.  My stepdaughter has not been since I've known her (more than 4 years now).  But yet, T and I are intimately familiar with the nice new hospital near us on the west side of town.

Somehow I rammed my foot into T's foot while at a music festival last night.  At first, I just spewed out some expletives since it just hurt a lot - like stubbing a toe.  Then I made the mistake of looking down.  My big toe's toenail was flipped backward and blood was gushing out of my toe and pooling up on the ground and my sandal.  Awesome.  We found the first aid tent and they wrapped me up all nice (while the tech's girlfriend ran away screaming -- I'm serious).  They said if it still hurt, I should go to the ER because they couldn't tell if there were lacerations and I may need stitches.  It did hurt this morning, but I decided to just go to the walk-in clinic instead.  All's good and the ER was avoided, but I apparently won't have a big toenail for 6 months to 1 year.  And I had to get a tetanus shot, so now I have a super cute bandaid with butterflies on my left arm.  I'm guessing the hipsters at the music festival tonight will find it ironic, and I'll start some major trend.

Hopefully we'll be able to tell our kid someday that he/she was conceived on that crazy weekend where I almost lost my toe!  Since this was our first month on Clomid, we went in on Friday for an ultrasound to check out the progress.   Friday was cycle day 13.  Per my instructions, the ultrasound should technically be on CD14, but they won't schedule them on weekends.  However, when we got there, the nurse said that really they should be on CD15.  So she was concerned that the ultrasound would be too early.  Since we are paying out of pocket (an ultrasound is ~$300), she wanted us to consider coming back on Monday.  I normally ovulate on CD15 (Sunday this time), but wasn't sure how the Clomid would change things.  We hemmed and hawed and then said it's only money and went ahead with the Friday ultrasound.

The nurse immediately said we made the right choice, as there was no way we'd last until Monday.  They are looking for follicles on both ovaries to see how many eggs we could potentially have.  A follicle is considered mature around a size of 20mm and grows about 1-2mm a day.  We were hoping for two follicles -- or at least one REALLY good one that was maybe "better" than my prior natural cycles".

I had THREE follicles > 20 mm (one 25mm, one 22mm, and then one right at 20mm).  I also had one at 14mm that could feasibly have an egg, but would likely not.  So she called them 3.5 follicles.  She was shocked they only retrieved six eggs during my IVF while I was on the grandaddy of meds versus these 3.5 follicles on Clomid.  I think this definitely shows if we need to do IVF again, they will be changing my drug protocol, because I can definitely react to something!

T and I had originally said that we'd go forward with the IUI with three follicles, but not with four.  The 3.5 of course put us in the gray zone.  After some chatting with the nurse, she reminded us that the follicles may not all have eggs, and of course even if they do, all eggs may not fertilize.  We took a deep sigh and decided to go for it.

I had not seen a "smiley face" on my ovulation predictor yet, so she wanted to go ahead and schedule the IUI for Saturday morning since we were obviously ready to burst.  She was afraid we somehow missed the LH surge that gives you the smiley face.  We were supposed to wake up Saturday morning and test again -- if it was negative, we'd come in for the insemination on Saturday.  If we did get the smiley face, then we'll know it's working correctly and reschedule to Sunday (day after the surge).  We indeed got the smiley this morning, so Sunday morning (CD15 - right on schedule), I'll go in and give this whole crazy thing a try again.

We do always manage to get excited on cycles where "something" is different - whether a better sperm count or more follicles in this case.  So fingers crossed that this results in something fun (and ideally not quadruple the fun!). 
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